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Johnny Manzielreveals that he once attempted to take his own life after a series of public scandals and personal struggles, in an emotional installment ofNetflix’sUntolddocumentary series.
“When I had gotten everything I’d ever wanted, I think I was the most empty that I ever felt inside,” Manziel, 30, shared in the episode. “I think I was trying to suppress how I felt and get out of being Johnny Football.”
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Among several shocking — and clarifying — confessions inUntold: Johnny Footballabout the goings-on that led to his controversial behavior, the former Texas A&M quarterback said he “had bought a gun that I knew I was going to use,” he explained.
“I had planned to do everything that I wanted to do at that point in my life, spend as much money as I possibly could, and then my plan was to take my own life."
Manziel said he went through with his plan. “Still to this day, I don’t know what happened but the gun just clicked on me.”
Reflecting on the path that led him to the attempt, Manziel recalled spending most of his days after being drafted into the NFL escaping “everybody and everything” in his Cleveland apartment.
“I just felt empty,” he explained. “I wanted nothing to do with football.”
Eventually, the Browns cut him (which felt like “the biggest weight lifted” from his shoulders at the time), but Manziel’s declining mental health caught up to him before he could regain control. “When you take one step onto a slippery slope, you know, it goes pretty quick,” he explained, adding that he “had bigger issues” than football to tackle at the time in 2016.
During that year, hewas accused of hitting and threateningex-girlfriend Colleen Crowley. Later that year,an agreement was reached to dismissthe charges,CBS Sportsreported at the time. Manziel attended mandatory anger management classes and entering rehab, and the charges were eventually dismissed in November 2017.
InUntold,Manziel said the subsequent weeks after his relationship grew increasingly toxic made him grow spiteful.
Johnny Manziel.Getty Images
From there, the “direct self-sabotage” worsened, and he “really ramped up” his drug use, namely cocaine and oxycontin, to “a constant, daily” activity, he shared.
“The wires in my head seemed twisted,” Manziel said, before sharinghe was diagnosed with bipolar disorderand began really struggling with suicidal thoughts.
Manziel’s family sat down for Netflix’s documentary, including his father, Paul Manziel, who recalled several attempts to convince his son to enter a treatment center in those days.
“I wanted to get him help. We all knew he was self-destructing,” he shared.
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Later during hisUntoldappearance, Paul said he feels “blessed” that his son is “still with us,” after looking back on the dark time for his family.
Paul added, “We can mend all the fences still but I think Johnnys got a lot better days coming than what he’s had.”
Untold: Johnny Footballstreams on Netflix beginning Aug. 8.
source: people.com
